BlathrWayne Lorentz

Showing blathrs with the tag “Nature.”

And wrikles, like you

Sunday, November 6th, 2022 Alive 18,821 days

Tina the lizard

Today I got a good look at Tina, the lizard who lives in my garden.

She has blue eyes, like my wife.

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Warming her cockles

Friday, October 28th, 2022 Alive 18,812 days

Tima the lizard on a light bulb

Itʼs chilly today, so Tina is warming herself on a lightbulb in my garden.

Tina the lizard hugs a lightbulb for warmth
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Come get some dinner

Thursday, October 27th, 2022 Alive 18,811 days

Tina the lizard in the garden

There is a new visitor to the garden these days. Her name is Tina. Today I saw her leap from a pot onto a flower and eat a fly. Good lizard.

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Zzzz shell

Monday, September 26th, 2022 Alive 18,780 days

A turtle on a rock in the sun in the Japanese Garden at Hermann Park

One of the best features of the Sunday Morning program on CBS is the part at the end where we get to see some part of the natural world. No lasers. No music. No talking heads. Just birds, and plants, and bees, and animals doing what they're meant to do.

While CBS has slashed the time devoted to that segment each week from minutes down to mere seconds, other television stations like KHOU/Houston and Sky News, have started adding these segments.

As a former television producer, I know that in addition to be beautiful and memorable and giving people a reason to stop and stare, these segments with soft ending times are useful for padding out a short show, or sacrificing so that I can cram in some last-minute story.

With the infinite resources of the intarweb, there's no need to cut nautre for time. So here is my gift to you: A turtle being all turtle-y in Hermann Park. Watch as long as you like.

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Cleanliness counts

Thursday, August 18th, 2022 Alive 18,741 days

If the dirt on the sidewalk apron is deep enough to support plant life, perhaps it's time for the City of Houston to invest in a street sweeper.

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Youʼre a pond hen

Tuesday, May 24th, 2022 Alive 18,655 days

The reflecting pool outside the New Orleans Museum of Art

Meet my friend, Lily. This is her pad.

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Monday, May 23rd, 2022 Alive 18,654 days

Ferns sprouting from a crack in a tomb

Nature finds a way.

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Murder log at two oʼclock

Wednesday, April 27th, 2022 Alive 18,628 days

An alligator cruises the canal

Itʼs not the ones you can see that you have to worry about. Itʼs the ones you canʼt see.

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A very special set of disposal skills

Wednesday, April 27th, 2022 Alive 18,628 days

A swamp on Lake Anahuac, near Turtle Bayou

I donʼt know why the mob bothers hiding the bodies of its enemies in Indiana corn fields, or New Jersey stadia, or Nevada reservoirs. Chuck a corpse in a gulf coast swamp, and itʼll be chewed up, digested, and reduced to gator nuggets in a matter of hours.

Even if the F.B.I. knows where to look, the agents will be like, “Yeah, weʼll just let them have this one.”

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Lillies, sans water

Wednesday, April 27th, 2022 Alive 18,628 days

Sprouts defy the sun-baked earth

Nature finds a way.

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Buggy bedsit

Saturday, February 19th, 2022 Alive 18,561 days

There are more creatures living in this eight-ounce, two-day-old mud puddle than in my entire seventeen-story apartment building.

Nature finds a way.

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Howʼs the gift shop?

Saturday, February 19th, 2022 Alive 18,561 days

I spent the morning at the tree museum. I think the Houston Botanic Garden will be really nice in ten years or so. Today, it looks a lot like itʼs just barely gotten off the ground. Lots of saplings on bare earth. Bulldozers. Sections cordoned off for construction. Urban hillbillies riding quads over the exhibits.

I became a member last year, but probably wonʼt renew. The benches that were nice for sitting on and looking at nature have been removed. Itʼs doing concerts now, farming for restaurants, and charging unwarranted prices to walk through its Christmas lights display. Even members have to pay, which is very unusual amongst serious musea.

It has a good location, and lots of potential. I suspect that the financial pressures of COVID have caused its leadership to lose its way in the forest.

Plants at the Houston Botanic Garden
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Finders keepers

Wednesday, February 9th, 2022 Alive 18,551 days

A bird trying to open a plastic baggie to get to a peanut butter sandwich

I think someone leaves peanut butter sandwiches around for the homeless people in my neighborhood.

I think someone doesnʼt realize that grackles love peanut butter sandwiches, and are really quite clever.

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A gaggle of grackles

Thursday, December 23rd, 2021 Alive 18,503 days

Grackles having a meeting

I know that a group of crows is called a “murder,” and a group of ravens is called an “unkindness.” So I shall coin the term “an arrogance of grackles.”

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More patch than pumpkins

Sunday, October 17th, 2021 Alive 18,436 days

A nice autumn day at the tree museum.

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Searching the web

Sunday, October 10th, 2021 Alive 18,429 days

A jumping spider in its web

I woke up to a jumping spider in my garden. I guess theyʼre called that because of the way people jump when they run across one first thing in the morning.

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Bee bum

Friday, October 8th, 2021 Alive 18,427 days

A bee jamming itself inside a flower

I spent a bit of today watching the bees toil outside of the Houston City Hall Annex.

Iʼve been told that the big bees, like this one, are locals. Itʼs the small bees that are migratory.

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Pile it on

Saturday, September 25th, 2021 Alive 18,414 days

A weathered piling

Time and tide conspire to turn a piling into a cylinder of art.

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Spidey sense

Friday, May 28th, 2021 Alive 18,294 days

A male black widow spider trying to sell me solar panels

I went for a walk to Starbucks today. No more masks. Not even signs for masks. Clearly there is a hazard, since the employees are still masked and hiding behind toll booth-grade plexiglass. But the rest of the store? Come on in! Sit and and stretch out! Stay all day! Go ahead and take your boots off and dig at your blackened toenails with a Bowie knife, weʼre all friends here!

I should have known it was a bad idea when I opened the door to my apartment and there was a black widow spider standing there. Not a female like we all know from the Batman TV shows. But a male black widow, which is larger, skinnier, and looks like a homeless crab with a hangover.

On the plus side, itʼs hard to get killed by a male black widow unless you disturb its web. Which means I should stop messing about with random spider webs I see on the way to get the mail.

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Date ranching date

Saturday, May 8th, 2021 Alive 18,274 days

The road to China Ranch

We went to China Ranch today. Itʼs one of those places that makes me feel calm. If I had no debts, no obligations, and no cares in the world, Iʼd try my hand at being one of the China Ranch farm workers, picking dates in the desert, living in a rusty trailer, and generally staying off of civilizationʼs radar.

Since I do have debt, obligations, and cares in the world, I relish seeing the creatures of the wilderness. The score this trip:

  • Quail
  • Two kinds of lizards, including a cool one with a blue beard
  • Ravens
  • Hawks
  • Three coyotes
  • Crayfish

The crayfish donʼt belong here. Like the bullfrogs that pollute the few water sources in the desert, they were planted by settlers who though they might be useful for food. Unfortunately, theyʼre the reason the entire Pahrump pupfish population has to live in a concrete fish prison out in Corn Creek.

Unlike the Amargosa dace and Devilʼs Hole fish, they didnʼt evolve in a hot spring, so in the winter they just kind of get sluggish and stop moving. Itʼs like aquatic hibernation. And since they canʼt flee, they are easy snacks for the big crayfish that were brought in from Louisiana a hundred years ago.

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DId you bring me a cookie?

Tuesday, April 27th, 2021 Alive 18,263 days

Darcie and I spent a peaceful day at China Ranch. Lots of wildlife running around, getting ready for the Summer ahead.

China Ranch is a place where an earthquake opened up a big crack in the desert letting the usually underground Amargosa River see the light of day for about a half mile. In the 1930ʼs someone established a date farm there, and you can get fresh date bread and date shakes at the little farm stand, and go for long walks hours away from anyone else. Itʼs just a nice place to get out of our heads for a while.

The crayfish donʼt belong here. Like bullfrogs, they were planted by settlers who though they might be useful for food. Unfortunately, theyʼre the reason the entire Pahrump pupfish population has to live in a concrete fish prison out in Corn Creek. Unlike the Amargosa dace and Devilʼs Hole pupfish, they didnʼt evolve in a hot spring, so in the winter they just kind of get sluggish and stop moving. Itʼs like aquatic hibernation. Since they canʼt flee, they are easy snacks for the big crayfish that were brought in from Louisiana a hundred years ago.

People ruin things. But I live in a place where several types of creatures have learned that not only are chihuahuas tasty, theyʼre slow, stupid, and frequently found behind doggie doors. Doggie doors are very common here. Sometimes nature gets even, and it makes the newspaper.

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Itʼs not easy being green

Sunday, April 18th, 2021 Alive 18,254 days

An unwanted frog

I like toads. I always have. But I donʼt know if Iʼm supposed to like this toad, or not.

Itʼs a California Toad, a subspecies of the Western Toad. The problem is that itʼs living on the edge of a very small spring that is the only home of the hyper-endangered Amargosa Dace, a type of pupfish.

The pupfish only live in this one little hole; nowhere else on earth. The toads live all over the West, from the Rockies to Alaska to Mexico.

In centuries past, settlers populated the isolated springs and oases of the Mojave Desert with frogs, in order to use them for food. Tiny, slimy, amphibious cattle. In doing so, they wiped out many populations of endangered fish.

Thatʼs why this toad may not belong here. He may be a descendant of hungry and industrious settlers of the 1800ʼs. Or he may have been here all along, since this is still California Toad territory.

Iʼd ask someone, but these are COVID times, so none of the nearby ranger stations are manned.

A California Toad and his mate, basking in the sun
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One bad ass

Saturday, April 17th, 2021 Alive 18,253 days

A posse of burros in Beatty, Nevada

You think youʼre a bad ass? You think youʼre hard core? You ainʼt nothinʼ compared to the burros of the American West.

The lesser-traveled parts of this nation are infested with feral burros. They were brought out here to help the miners. When the miners went away, they left their companions behind. Itʼs all very sad.

Heʼs so lonely

Today, there are far more burros than the sparse desert environment can support, and many of them suffer. The federal government spends your tax dollars doing what it can to try to keep the population down, but a burroʼs gotta burro. Every now and again, there is a roundup of feral burros, much to the howls of online environmentalist poseurs who have only seen them on the internet, have never actually studied them in person, and donʼt have a better solution.

The captured burros are offered for adoption, but just like with humans, there are never enough homes for all of those who need one. Unlike humans, some of the adopted burros end up in illegal slaughterhouses, and thence as food for people and and pets in Asia, and rumor has it — France.

These burros are in the town of Beatty, Nevada. Theyʼre so used to being around people, and not giving fuck one what anyone thinks of them that they regularly block traffic, stare in windows, and generally make a comic nuisance of themselves.

They are the unofficial mascots of Beatty, and there have been some efforts to make them a tourist attraction. But tourists generally donʼt cuddle up to attractions that take a dump wherever they like.

“None shall pass!”
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Ram tough

Thursday, April 15th, 2021 Alive 18,251 days

Bighorn sheep in Valley of Fire State Park

If this is what rush hour looks like, you may be in the Valley of Fire.

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Frogs and flies

Saturday, April 10th, 2021 Alive 18,246 days

Hereʼs a very sad picture. At least in modern times.

In centuries past, this little hole in the ground was a life-saver. For pioneers, for local indian tribes, and for many others it provided vital water in the desert wilderness. Today, though, itʼs a reminder of things gone wrong.

This is Longstreet Spring, at Ash Meadows National Wildlife Refuge. Itʼs a boiling spring, which isnʼt a reference to the temperature of the water, but to the way the water forces itself up through a layer of sand at the bottom, making it look like the bottom of the pond is boiling.

This used to be the home of a thriving population of endangered fish. The fish are gone now, eaten by frogs brought by the pioneers. Today, all that live here are frogs and the insects that feed them.

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Moody much?

Monday, February 15th, 2021 Alive 18,192 days

Sunset over the Rainbow Mountains

Thereʼs nothing like a good sunset to make you understand the vastness of the desert, and how insignificant you really are.

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Bullʼs eye!

Wednesday, January 6th, 2021 Alive 18,152 days

I was reading the paper on my balcony when a hummingbird decided to use the feeder above my head. So I thought it would be a good time to try out my telephone's slow motion video function.

Then he pooped on my head.

Also in slow motion.

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Some marshmallows would be nice

Saturday, September 19th, 2020 Alive 18,043 days

Wildfire smoke coming in from California

This week the smoke has been bad. Even with all of the house air filters on high, it still smells like a camp fire, even inside.

I took a picture this morning showing the brown cloud of smoke drifting in from Death Valley. Normally I can see both ridges clearly. This morning it was all haze.

Clear skies return

An hour later, the wind kicked up and blew it all away.

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Put it on their bills

Thursday, April 2nd, 2020 Alive 17,873 days

Las Vegas locked down is a weird place. With no humans on The Strip, the city is being taken over by waterfowl.

Local media has been showing photos and video of geese and ducks all over the casinos. The theory is that they're attracted by the people-less fountains. Last week, I saw some video of a family of ducks that have made a home in one of the revolving doors of The Bellagio.

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🐢

Thursday, March 5th, 2020 Alive 17,845 days

A tortoise crossing sign

For four miles, I saw no tortoises. I feel ripped off.

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Darkeness is next

Friday, July 26th, 2019 Alive 17,622 days

A grasshopper munching on a cactus in front of my house

Every once in a while Las Vegas is invaded by locusts.

There were 37 on the door when I got to work yesterday. Plus eleven more in the lunch room and nine in the hall.

Imagine that. A plague of locusts descending on a city of sinners in the desert. Sounds appropriately Biblical.

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