Blathr Wayne Lorentz

What is Blathr?
Showing blathrs with the tag “Children.”

Not scary at all

Thursday, October 15th, 2020 Alive 18,069 days

A clipping from the Navajo Times

If arming dinosaurs with massive hypodermic needles makes getting a flu shot less scary for kids, then I guess I donʼt understand kids.

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Thursday, March 12th, 2020 Alive 17,852 days

Overheard in Albertsons today: “Maddysyn! If you donʼt behave, Iʼm going to send you to school!”

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Sunday, September 1st, 2019 Alive 17,659 days

Iʼm sitting in a Starbucks reading the New York Times.

Three children politely stare at me as they await their drinks, while their mother whispers privately to them.

On the way out, the mother quietly explains to me: theyʼve never seen a newspaper.

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Wait till they get to Kohlʼs

Saturday, February 2nd, 2019 Alive 17,448 days

I think I’ve figured out why three-year-olds in Target shriek like it’s the worst thing thatʼs ever happen to them.

It’s because they’re three years old, and going to Target probably is the worst thing that’s ever happened to them so far.

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Thursday, January 17th, 2019 Alive 17,432 days

Incognito children

New neighbors are moving in across the street. Last night the parents arrived. This morning a big Bekins truck arrived. This afternoon, the kids arrived. I guess every day is Halloween in that house now.

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Tuesday, December 4th, 2018 Alive 17,388 days

A Nevada Blind Childrenʼs Foundation Christmas tree

Today I learned that blind children are better at decorating Christmas trees than I am.

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Saturday, November 3rd, 2018 Alive 17,357 days

One of the neighbor kids is learning to play the trumpet. Heʼs terrible, and everyone knows it because he likes to practice outside. It freaks out the cats.

The good news is that heʼs now getting lessons.

The bad news is that now it sounds like there are two people are trying to murder Chuck Mangione in my backyard.

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