Blathr Wayne Lorentz

What is Blathr?
Showing blathrs with the tag “Cooking.”

Toil and trouble

Sunday, October 30th, 2022 Alive 18,814 days

Burrito stuffins simmering on the stove

I decided to make my own frozen burritos. For the filling, I had two choices:

  1. Buy a can of ready-to-go burrito filling from the supermarket for $1.09
  2. Spend $15 following a recipe from the New York Times Cooking section

Naturally, I went the hard route.

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Brain freeze

Thursday, September 15th, 2022 Alive 18,769 days

A package of H.E.B. frozen cheese ravioli

This H.E.B. frozen cheese ravioli is “ready to cook.” Is there another option? Does H.E.B. sell “some assembly required” cheese ravioli?

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Transportation artery

Wednesday, August 10th, 2022 Alive 18,733 days

An ad for Butcher Boy cooking oils

If you see an advertisement for cooking oil while on the subway, you might be in the Middle West.

Very wholesome.

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Culinary cartography

Friday, February 25th, 2022 Alive 18,567 days

A waffle maker that makes Texas-shaped waffles

This is pretty much the most Texas thing Iʼve seen today.

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Thinking is hard

Thursday, November 11th, 2021 Alive 18,461 days

A column in todayʼs newspaper suggests, “Try a plant-based sweetener like Stevia” instead of sugar.

So what exactly to millennials think sugar is made from? Rocks? Oil? The dried, ground up bones of boomers?

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Wrapped attention

Saturday, October 9th, 2021 Alive 18,428 days

My microwave offering to cook precisely one frozen burrito

Today I discovered that my microwave has a frozen burrito function.

Where have you been all my life?

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Does it rock?

Saturday, August 7th, 2021 Alive 18,365 days

Sabbath mode on a KitchenAid oven

It turns out my new oven has a Sabbath mode. It also turns out to do the opposite of what I assumed it would.

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Up next: Italian chili

Saturday, February 13th, 2021 Alive 18,190 days

A pair of ragged homemade pizzas

Darcie likes when I make her pizza from scratch. I donʼt do it as often as I should because the dough is a lot of work.

But when I do accede to her cravings, I also make myself a “cowboy pizza.” Itʼs made from whatever I happen to find in the refrigerator that is remotely pizza-like. Peppers, onions, tomatoes, bits of random leftover meats and cheeses.

I call it “cowboy” pizza because I cook it in a cast iron skillet, since I only have one pizza pan.

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Blue mold

Thursday, November 26th, 2020 Alive 18,111 days

Runny Jell-O

Darcie: “You made a Jell-O mold?”

Me: “Yep!”

Darcie: “What flavor?”

Me: “Raspberry failure!”

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Indigestion

Tuesday, September 3rd, 2019 Alive 17,661 days

A pie chart illustrating the amount of content versus commericals in the Good Eats: The Return TV show

I just slogged through an episode of Good Eats: The Return on Food Network Go.

There were 26 commercials for just two recipes!

I hope Alton Brown got a new car out of it, since I had to watch the same Enterprise Rent-a-Car commercial seven times in a row in one break.

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Saturday, March 23rd, 2019 Alive 17,497 days

Spaghetti about to get its ends singed

Someone should invent a tall and skinny, or a short and narrow cooking pot to deliver us from the tyranny of spaghetti-burning overhang.

No, I canʼt just break the spaghetti into pieces. That wonʼt work for Cincinnati chili.

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Saturday, February 16th, 2019 Alive 17,462 days

Cans of Skyline chili

Three day weekend.

Four cans of Skyline chili.

Challenge accepted.

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Wednesday, November 21st, 2018 Alive 17,375 days

I think this is the cat equivalent of a dog drinking all of the water from a Christmas tree stand.

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Sunday, September 30th, 2018 Alive 17,323 days

Eggs on the fry

Whenever I read my cowboy books at night, it makes me want to use my cast iron skillet in the morning.

Being dumb enough to grab the hot iron handle is probably not the only way Iʼm not a cowboy.

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Saturday, September 29th, 2018 Alive 17,322 days

Getting the fire ready to cook dinner

Shhh! Nobody tell Darcie Iʼm cooking outdoor dinner again tonight. Sheʼll get McDonaldʼs on her way home!

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Saturday, September 22nd, 2018 Alive 17,315 days

A backyard cookout

Under 95° on a weekend? You know Darcieʼs coming home to an outdoor dinner.

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